This all sounds so familiar, just throw in that I live in a very narrow minded state. Being any kinda of different is cause for them to think that I am easy and trouble. I hate it, but I like the thought of telling them that I have a wider range to choose from and that I can be picky, thanks for that.
Brigid

> If it's any consolation, I think it's harder for bi boys than bi girls - the reigning
> assumption is that bi boys are just gay boys in denial. Sigh....

I dunno...I think there might be more pressure on the bi boys to "choose an orientation"...and most likely FROM the gay boys (who naturally all want them to be gay! :-P )...but I also think that the stereotype with bi women inclines many (lesbians...but mostly of the vanilla variety, I find...especially included, I fear) to also think that they're going to "settle on men" instead of women or simply staying bloody BI.

Well, not this femmey-dyke...I'm very supportive of my bi sistahs! (Well, except for the "trendy-bi's" who actually ARE just fronting for a 3some with "their man". You know the ones I mean. :-P )

Hey, I love the 3somes, 4somes, and more-somes, too...as long as there aren't any boys involved. :-P

(Not even "no penises"...girls who just happen to have those are fine, too!)

that's why I'm not one of your Earth "people". :-P

I don't know about that...I think a lot of lesbian women genuinely feel uneasy sharing someone important with them, either physically and concurrently or else in more of a "potential way", with men. I don't think that's invalid...but I also don't think that's any reason to think that bi women are somehow bad.

I know that, at this point, having felt what for me is a very nasty emotional sting from being left, dropped, or "demoted" in a couple of primary relationships now for men, I'm not willing to risk that again. My non-primary lovers...OK, no problem. But I'm not as invested with them as I am with my primary.

Is this "anti-bi", tho? Or is it just protecting myself from a very real possibility, even if it means holding some women who may be absolutely wonderful at emotional "arm's length"?

One has to realize that there are as many reasons for lesbians to be hesitant with bi women as women who feel that way, just like there are as many ways to be bi as there are bisexual people...that it's not all blanket prejudice, but sometimes bitter experience that makes one feel "twice shy". In my experience, none of this (or very little, anyway) has to do with older "separatist" notions. The Camp Sister Spirits and MichFests of the world are pretty much relics at this point. (Where are my asbestos undies for that one? ;-) )

I mean, maybe I'm just out of touch, existing as I do within very kinky, bi-friendly women's spaces...maybe the vanilla-dyke world out there is completely different. But my experience, both internally with myself and externally with others has never been one of "bi women are bad people" (since anyone who thinks that is a blithering idiot!)...but rather, "I just can't go there, no matter how wonderful she is...it hurts/scares me too much."

We are all human...

Im tired of people obsessing over labels. All that matters is that we are kind to others.

We are all human...

Even though we forget this, due to geographical locale's. It has been, and always will be different to be a human from America... then a human from Rwanda!

We are the same, yet so different.
This world has many troubles, and yes sexuality is one of them.

Humble yourself every day... by saying:
"I have been better off."
"I have been worse off" .... but IM ALIVE!

Experiencing, living, loving....

that's the problem, they are turned on by bi women because they want a threesome so they think hey bonus. they don't understand that you can be bi and monogomus.