<Thanks Schirin I think the people who kicked me out were wrong too. But they are "second generation devotees" and they think they know better than everybody else, just because they were born Hare Krishna's. It is like a caste system that only they can understand.>

Well anyone who exalts him or her self above others within the same faith because they feel they are more mature than another, while exhibiting signs of immaturity through exclusionary practices, is deluded.

<I'll try to take a little time to explain these questions that you had, I guess they require explanations. Krishna has an internal potency and an external potency. The external potency is the God we all think of, and the internal potency is what He is really made of, and that is Radharani's love. That is why I think Radharani is actually God, and She just allows Krishna to think He is. In any case, it means God has two powers, male and female. >

I feel that God is one being, who made both men and women to be reflections of Him and we receive either His more feminine characteristics or the more masculine, whether we are in a feminine body or a masculine body (and in some cases, those who have the masculine body have a feminine energy, or vice versa, which causes those beings to have confusion about who they are, which is a difficult journey).

<I like that Hebrews verse, it is one of my favorites, yes we are destined to die once and then the judgement. Then we die again and are judged again, and on and on. Jesus asked His disciples who do the people say I am? And they replied some say you are Isaih come back from the dead. And Jesus said John the Baptist was.>

Actually, darlin, this is not true. The conversation was thus:

When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, "Who do people say the Son of Man is?"
They replied, "Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets."
"But what about you?" he asked. "Who do you say I am?"
Simon Peter answered, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God."
Jesus replied, "Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by man, but by my Father in heaven.

<Again in any case, whether these quotes mean what I think they do or not, there were earlier mentionings of reincarnation in the Bible but they were removed around 300 a d by an Emporer Justinian or someone. >

I don't believe this...sounds like a rumor.

<The Vrndavana mood is the mood of all the people in the highest abode, Krishna's planet in the spiritual sky. There all the creatures love Krishna, not as God, but as the most beautiful boy, playing on His flute, tending the cows and playing with His cowherd boyfriends. At night He sneaks out with the gopis and they all dance under the moonlight. Krishna expands Himself into as many forms as there are cowherd maidens, or Goddesses of Fortune, and each and every gopi thinks that Krishna is dancing with her alone.>

Sounds like a fairy tale. IMO there is no evidence that this is so, aside from stories made up and passed down from generation to generation.

<Krishna is more dear to all of them than their very lives. They are all liberated souls.
Here in the material world we are all conditioned souls, in comparison to the liberated souls mentioned above. We have to become liberated from our material conditioning so we no longer identify with our material bodies and then we can go back to Godhead, Krishna's planet. >

Being aware of our human conditioning and spiritual self in this lifetime is something you and I can agree on is important.

<Radharani does love me I tell you it is true, but I can't say how. Alright I'll tell you how I know, She told me so Herself, and She said Krishna loves me too. But I'm not supposed to say that. >

That's strange to me, that you're not supposed to say that "God" (I guess the word Krishna here is exchangable?) loves you? He loves everyone, even those who have done considerable wrongs, only He won't necessarily bless everyone because He can choose to ignore them if they aren't seeking Him: "If anyone turns a deaf ear to the law, even his prayers are detestable."

<he devotees who kicked me out of their Tribe are only trying to uphold the highest Krishna Conscious standard in regards to me. They realize I am a disturbance wherever I go so they don't want me hanging around at Radha Tribe disturbing people's consciousnesses. >

I think that's why I wanted to talk to you. I am often accused and chastised for disturbing people's consciousness. Perhaps that's why I felt a kinship with you, despite our differing belief systems. That, and we both prefer women! :-)

This is strange...I had a dream last night about people I never ever think about, from high school, which ended 15 years ago. There was a boy I knew then who was doing something where he was filming this wall of vines. He made it appear that they were growing faster from the wall through time lapse photography, only I was seeing it as if they were really growing that fast. I then had to help him, give him a leg up into some rocks. The next thing I knew, I had a girl that I knew in high school, who I never had a thing for at all, so that's what is weird, she was in my arms naked and I was just laying next to/behind her holding her and we were talking to this other girl from high school who was her friend. The girl I was holding was fine with it until the other girl frowned on her, on what we were doing, so she got up and left and didn't look back. This has happened to me in real life before, where someone was ok with their bisexuality until someone else they knew frowned upon it and then they shunned me. I don't know if this dream had any significance or was just a dream.

<Schirin if you could ever read the book KRSNA The Supreme Personality of Godhead it tells you all about Krishna's planet and the residents of Vrndavana. It also tells about the gopis and Radharani, and we are actually forbidden to even say Her name, that's how holy Her pastimes are. At least we can't chant it like a mantra in front of the altar in the temple. But we do say it all the time. Hare of the Hare Krishna mantra means Radharani. By chanting Hare Krishna Hare Rama we are constantly associating with Srimati Radharani and advanced devotees taste the pleasure of chanting Her holy names. Unfortunately I am not one of them. But I know some day I will be. >

I don't know, C.K. This seems like idol worship to me. Maybe I don't get it still.